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Audiophiles freak out about Apple buying Beats

No one’s taking the “Apple buys Beats” rumor harder than audiophiles. (Well, the rumor possibly confirmed by Dr. Dre himself in this video—it contains swearing, so put your Beats on if you’re playing it at work.)

Poor audiophiles. Maybe they’re just frustrated from years of explaining the superior qualities of FLAC files to people who couldn’t care less, or their middle-aged ears have mild tinnitis from too many Rush concerts, giving them issues with (and pickiness about) high frequencies. But they certainly are one complainy bunch.

Check out some of the tweets that are making us giggle in today’s new world, the “Apple buys Beats” world, the world where nothing will ever be the same. (Except everything’s the same, with the exception of Apple buying Beats.)

Um, sir, I think you forgot about these champagne-colored HD 598s, which would match the gold iPhone pretty darn well.

Hi-yooo! Because Apple fans like overpriced products, get it? Although the whole “Apple tax” myth has been debunked a few times as far as computers go, and Apple’s phones and tablets are priced pretty comparably with their competitors.

Plus, Sennheiser doesn’t have a music streaming service, so it really isn’t perfect for APPLE.

Wait, didn’t Grado shoot first?

Grandpa Simpson is yelling at clouds again.

I wish Grandpa Simpson was on Twitter.

Because appealing to mainstream consumers never makes money.

Yeah, this is what’s wrong with the world, a big company buying another company instead of a third or fourth company. Pearl clutching FTW.

Bose doesn’t have a streaming service either.

Wait, wait, hip is in? Since when?! Are you sure?

An audiophile with a lot of respect for Beats’ success, according to a recent interview with Jimmy Iovine.

Yeah, Steve Jobs totally hated brilliant business decisions.

Look, audiophiles, Tim Cook is not coming to your house to smash your Sennheisers under his bootheel and force you at gunpoint to listen to compressed music on a portable device through Beats headphones and nothing but Beats headphones. Plug whatever you want into your headphone jack; this is America.

Of course, then there are the reverse audiophiles who fear lame Apple will somehow lame up cool Beats.

Look, Apple, if you can't please everyone, you might as well just hang it up. Unless, wait...are we being trolled?

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